Stand By Me

The spousal unit has gone back to university to finish her degree, and some people don't seem to like it. She has been quite discouraged lately by the response of some. The latest was just yesterday, when a long time friend and his wife decided that Spouse was not making acceptable choices about her life, and that she had no right to blog about things that bothered her. I can only guess that they are leading the correct and proper life and this gives them the right and duty to rudely and arrogantly point out other's errors. I was bothered by this and fired back with my own rebuttal. At this point the former friend made it clear that Spouse was no longer acceptable friend material. I used to like this man, I considered him intelligent, well read, and thoughtful, but now I can only see him as an inflexible, self-righteous dickhead. It seems that anyone who disagrees with him or his wife, or makes choices they wouldn't, is branded as an evil idiot. Apparently we are not the first friends they've thrown away for not matching their ideal way of living. Well, FUCK THEM! Sooner or later they'll find out they've run out of friends.

Real friends will tolerate your mistakes, even if they're the only ones who see them as such. Trust me, I've made this mistake myself twice in my life and regretted both. I threw away one friend for having a drug habit (which he later kicked), and another for cheating on his significant other.

Spouse's parents have been less than supportive as well. Her mother seems of the mind that unless there is a direct, practical, quick payoff to this education it is not worthwhile. She's been giving Spouse the cold shoulder. At least she hasn't disowned us.

Others, however, have different opinions. We have other friends (real friends it seems) who think that this is a wonderful thing. They are very much appreciated right now. We'll be seeing some of them this weekend, and I'll be sure to thank them.

She gave up her chance to finish over ten years ago, instead following me when I took a job out of town. I've learned to understand what that cost her. I won't ask her to give it up again. I believe it is important to complete this, even if it doesn't lead to a monetary payoff. MONEY IS NOT THE ONLY REWARD! OR THE MOST IMPORTANT! I put off leaving a job I hated because of the fear of losing money, to the point where it got me fired. The need for money made me miserable.
We are making sacrifices to do this. I won't say I'm enjoying them, but I see them as necessary.
To hell with those who would abandon us for this, or for defending what we're doing. To those who disapprove but keep it to themselves, so be it; hold your tongues. To those with us, thank you for being true friends.